Sgt. Benjamin Smith, U.S.M.C (KIA)

(reprinted from the Southern Illinoisan, September 25, 2004)

REMEMBERING BENJAMIN SMITH: SMITH FAMILY OFFERS INSIGHT INTO SON; SAYS HE WASN'T ALWAYS QUIET

BY JOHN D. HOMAN
THE SOUTHERN
[Sat Sep 25 2004]

CARTERVILLE -- There are not enough prayers that can be uttered, not enough pats on the back or whispers of encouragement offered, and certainly not enough money in the world to ease the pain and anguish of a family that has just lost a son, brother and husband-to-be.

Jim and Kim Smith of Carterville, along with grown children, Jamie and Jacob, and close family friend, Kerri Blum, met with members of the media Saturday afternoon and pasted on smiles when it was incredibly difficult for them to smile at all.

The family, grieving the loss of U.S. Marine Sgt. Benjamin Smith, 24, who was killed in an explosion in Iraq when encountering the enemy earlier this week, offered some insight into the young man that few people knew well.

On the surface, Smith was known as a quiet, shy, clean-cut kid who loved to play football, run track, and go hunting and fishing from time to time. He was also an above-average student, although not an elite scholar. He was well-liked by his peers and adults alike and would not hesitate to offer a helping hand to another in need. He was your typical kid next door.

What many people don't know, the Smiths say, is that their son could be a polar opposite at home.

"It's true that Benjamin was a good boy. I don't remember ever having to whip him once in all the time he was growing up," Kim Smith said. "His sister is the one who got all the spankings," she laughed. "But deep down, Benjamin was a jokester. He did a lot of goofy stuff and liked to ham it up in front of the camera anytime pictures were taken."

Smith's sister, Jamie Qualls, now 21, agreed with her mother's assessment.

"Ever since he was little, Ben would pretend to be picking his nose when pictures were taken. He liked getting a response from people," she said.

Qualls said she and her brother often hung out with the same circle of friends in Carterville.

"We could be mean to one another, but if anyone ever picked on Jacob or me, Ben would be there to stand up for us," she said.

Blum, a California resident who was introduced to Smith by mutual friends when he was being trained as a tank commander a couple of years ago, said she and Smith were planning to get married in the not-too-distant future.

"I can remember a time last year when we were in Las Vegas for the Marine Corps Ball and passed by a Del Taco restaurant," Blum said. "Ben saw a guy outside the restaurant dressed up like a taco and told me he had to get a picture with the guy in the taco suit. He was always doing silly stuff like that."

Blum, who got the opportunity to visit Southern Illinois on a couple of occasions over the last year, said Smith also enjoyed listening to country music, but she would usually strike out getting him to dance with her.

"Ben didn't like to dance," she said. "It's really hard losing him. We were hoping to get married and have babies together." Blum wiped away the tears as she firmly grasped Kim Smith's hand.

"You will always be a part of this family," Jim Smith said to her.

Jacob Smith, now 20, said his brother tried to teach him how to kick the football effectively, but the experiment was short-lived.

"That was something that I couldn't do very well, but I did play football in high school," Jacob said. "I played defensive end like Ben did before me."

Jacob, who apparently inherited much of his brother's shyness around strangers, said there were some occasions when he fished with Ben, but the age difference kept them apart much of the time when they were away from home.

Smith's father, Jim, said he treasures the memories he has out in the back yard with his son -- playing pitch-and-catch and showing Ben how to kick the football while Jacob shagged or retrieved the kicks. Like his son, Jim was a placekicker when he played football in the mid 1970s.

"Ben was a much better kicker than me," Jim said. "Plus, he could punt and I couldn't. And when it came to fishing, both grandpas (David Lee Smith and Robert L. Cowan) took over. I'm not much of a fisherman," he said.

The Smiths said they cannot begin to thank the community for the overwhelming support provided the family in recent days -- from the phone calls and cards, the personal visits and vast assortment of foods -- the efforts are much appreciated.

"It's simply been amazing," Kim Smith said. "This community has really opened its heart to us. Carterville is more than a community to us; it's a family. The people here love and support one another and have uplifted our spirits and faith.

"It's hard to lose a child, but it's a tribute to Ben that his life touched so many other lives," she said. "He was a good man who helped anybody he could. He made friends everywhere he went. He was dependable and trustworthy. We have nothing but good memories of him."

She added that it would be difficult to move on without her son, but said she couldn't be more proud of him.

"Out of this tragedy there does come something good. Ben led by example. He gave everything he had to protect our rights and our beliefs as Americans. And we need to remember that freedom isn't free; it costs very dearly. Because of that, we should cherish and honor our freedom."